Surprise surprise, I'm depressed again. Of course I don't want anyone to see it so I suffer throguh way to long nights crying ove nothng really, Holly's by my side. I don't understand when I got so sensetive, seriously it feels like I cry all the time, I don't, but it feels like it.We once said that it would be us against the world, what both of didn't think of then is that people grow up and people grow apart. Right now we barely speak, and I'm not blaming anyonr really. It's just that I can't keep up with this one way thing. If you don't care anymore then fine, but once we meant a lot to eachother, you still do to me, but aparently you don't feel the same anymore so I'm giving up. I have to move on too, and stop trying to live in what has been. Almost started crying twice on the bus to school, and once when I changed bus. And now while I'm writing this. Well tears won't fix anything, I know that. And of course I can't cry when I have people around me, I'm glad of that. I just can't take this anymore, once I seriously needed you to survive, now I'm tryng to find other ways. Hopefully someday soon I'll find something worth being happy for again, another ou. Though I know it's not possible, you're always gonna be in my heart, I just have to get you faaar back and place other things in front of you, the pain is too big.